Tuesday, January 26, 2010

A/S/L?



Ladies, breaking news!
I have discovered some very disturbing social behaviour in males that I feel is very necessary for you to be aware of. There is a new 'breed' of man that has existed for while but has only now become apparent in the nightclub/pub scene. They have expanded in population thus vastly becoming a growing epidemic. In recent nights out with my girlfriends a certain approach in picking up girls has become evident. Before I explain myself, let me just state that I was not 'heavily' under the influence when encountering this behaviour - so I could examinate my surroundings in a professional matter. Here are the two cases that we came across. Please note that all names have been changed.

Strike one: Dancing with my friend Shal* and notice that a very strange smelling male approached me and asked whether I have already been spoken for. He used other words, but I understood what he meant was whether I had a boyfriend. I said "I do". Common lie for the single female when she wishes to be left alone. I then gave myself an imaginary air high five, because I knew my answer would make him walk away. But to my surprise, the not so bright gentleman responded with "but he's not here"I then knew that I was being challenged. I had come face to face with a GTDGU. Guys That Don't Give Up. Whilst I am a fan of the 'not giving up attitude' I do however believe that in this scenario, guys should just give up.
I gave him no indication that I was interested, yet he didn't pick up on my 'get away loser' eyes and simply continued with Google'd pick up lines. This only made him seem MORE pathetic. I turned my back to him, danced away and made my friend follow. This didn't stop him, so we just created a cool dance move that enabled us to keep walking around the club and away from him.




Strike two: My friends and I were dancing fiercely in a circle and without anyone noticing a pint sized gentleman entered our circle and joined in. We knew something had messed with our groove. When I opened my eyes and came out of doing the running man, I noticed him. No one invited him and we all tried to turn out backs to him and snap him out of our circle. That didn't work. He then tried to talk to most of the 'circle' girls. His material was not impressive, as I could see these girls faces turn sour at the sight of him. While he was chatting we kept trying to push him out but it seemed like nothing was working, this tiny man was invincible. He wasn't going to leave without a fight. He honestly believed that we would come around and notice how amazing he was. He wasn't. So without warning, our friend Sush* approached him and said "You are really annoying, you need to leave. Nobody wants you here. You need to leave us alone and go!!"
Still smirking, he though he was still welcome in our circle, but I had enough. I stood in front of him and blocked the circle and yelled. "You're not invited in here! This gate is closed!" he still lingered but no longer would he join us in OUR circle.


Here are some eg. of ways to avoid the GTDGU:

If they ask you to dance: Your answer- I dont have any legs.

If they ask whether you have a boyfriend - I do, he's the security guard.

If they ask you for your number - I dont use a phone because I dont speak.

If they ask where you're from - I'm from Afghanistan


Obviously these answers are far from the truth, but in times of crisis they actually help. You see, these boys don't take no for an answer, and will not stand to be rejected. They think that we're easy. If you're answer is like any of the above than they will most likely not pursue you, as you then become a challenge. They don't want that. Its way too much work.

2 comments:

  1. Loved the fact that you can pretend to be from Afghanistan, but still it's worth a shot.
    To be honest Amanda, these type of men have always lingered in the "hunting woman"scene. They are revolting and pathetic.
    Have seen many of them that even try to be touchy too, these are the REAL ones to be cautious!

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  2. that is true Clau! They have been around for a while, I just thought that giving them a title would help put a stop to it and raise awareness.

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